Go Through The Fog, Reach Your Clearing!

Go Through The Fog, Reach Your Clearing!

Going through an obstacle can be like driving into a patch of fog. You know that it’s there but you can’t back up and you have to keep moving forward. In the beginning, it may not seem difficult because the patches are pretty light. In your mind, you may even be hoping that it won’t last long. And, it doesn’t appear to immediately affect your visibility. However, the farther you drive into the fog, the more you are surrounded by it and the thicker it becomes. It’s not long before you can only see so far in front of you. The fog becomes so dense; it’s only safe to move forward in baby steps. You may even have to drive slower than the speed limit.  And just when it may seem as though you see a clearing, here comes more fog. You don’t know when it’s going to end but all you can do is move forward and face the uncertainty on the other side.  In fact, don’t be surprised if the fog comes in several patches before it completely clears. As you move through it one thing is for sure, you must face it to get through it.

This is how I would like to challenge you to conquer your obstacles. Your “fog” may be a financial challenge, a failed relationship, or the loss of a job. No matter what it is, you must face it to get through it. Going through a struggle not only builds our character but it also strengthens our resilience. Even though moving in the opposite direction of the obstacle may seem the like the easy way out; it’s likely it will return and catch you off guard (like the fog). So go ahead, face your fear, conquer the challenge, and turn that obstacle into an opportunity!

Write About It: This week, reflect on the “fog” in your life. In what ways are you avoiding it?  What opportunities has it created for you? As you journal your responses, be truthful about what’s really keeping you from going through the fog and reaching your clearing. Afterwards, feel free to go my blog and share your breakthroughs!

 

What I learned from a 101 year old man.

What I learned from a 101 year old man.

Dear Visionaries,

A good friend of mine had the pleasure of taking care of her 101 year old grandfather in the last days of his life. Prior to becoming ill, he was still cooking for himself and lived in his own home. She kept me amused with how full of life he was and his vivid memory. I got the pleasure of meeting this young spirited man in person. By this time, he couldn’t say much but his eyes said so much. As I watched him, my mind began to wonder about all the events he had seen over the past century, the things he had done, and how much the world changed before his very eyes. And suddenly, I thought, I wonder if he fulfilled his purpose? If he had a little longer to live, what would he do?

Watching him slowly slip away from us, taught me a valuable lesson. When my life comes to an end, I want to be able to say that I have no regrets. “Life is too short” is such a cliché but yet it’s so true. This experience gave me the momentum to keep walking in my purpose and to do it with enthusiasm. No matter how overwhelming or challenging things may be, I’m determined to keep an optimistic outlook. I would rather go through obstacles to reach my goals than to simply give up without trying. The thought of dying without going after my purpose is depressing. So what about you? Have you discovered your purpose? If so, are you pursuing it? Unfortunately, we don’t know if we’ll reach 101 years old. However, we do know that every day that is given to us is a gift. It’s another chance to get a step closer to fulfilling our purpose. As for the 101 year old man, I believe he did live his purpose. He fulfilled his purpose by inspiring people with his gift of long life. And best of all, he lived his life with passion! So my challenge to you is to strive to do the same. Live Life with Passion!

Write About It: This week, reflect on the status of your life. Are you pursuing your true purpose? If you only had a short time to live, what would you do?  As you write, answer these questions and be honest with yourself. You’ll be surprised with what’s deep down inside of you. Or, maybe you won’t! Afterwards, feel free to go my blog and share your breakthroughs!

Who’s in your S.R.S.S?

Who’s in your S.R.S.S?

As women, we find ourselves making a smorgasbord of decisions, whether it’s related to our family, career, business, or finances; the list goes on and on. Whether positive or negative, I’ve discovered it’s critical to have five champions in your life. Because women are known as the world’s best multitaskers, we think we can “do it all”. Well the truth is that no one can “do it all” without what I like to call your Solid Rock Support System (S.R.S.S).

Your S.R.S.S is made up of five friends who you can reach out to for support, counsel, mentorship, and encouragement. No matter whom you choose, they should fit in one of the following categories:

1.      The Accountability Partner: Just when you are ready to call it quits, this friend will hold you to commitments that you’ve made. In the short-term, you may not want to call them with your urge to give up; however once you do, you’ll be glad you did.

2.      The Confidant: Everyone needs that one team player who will keep your secret, just that, a secret. It’s great to have someone who you can express how you really feel. And, the bonus is not only will this friend keep your secret but they won’t judge you in the process.

3.      The Go-Getter: If you’re afraid of taking risks, you’ll need the Go-Getter on your team. When it comes to reaching a goal or overcoming an obstacle, this friend will stretch you to the finish line. They will help you overcome the fear and see the potential.

4.      Ms. Congeniality: Cyndi Lauper said it best, “Oh, Girls Just Want To Have Fun.” That’s where Ms. Congeniality comes in. She’ll try all types of new and fun adventures like, salsa, a cross-country road trip, and be the life of any dry gathering. She not only makes you feel comfortable but keeps you laughing too. Especially, when times are tough, she can find the humorous side to any situation.

5.      The Authentic Advisor: Lastly, your S.R.S.S wouldn’t be complete without that “real” friend. She is going to give it you and give it you straight. “No holds barred” is her common rule of thumb. If you ask her for advice, hold on to your hat because she’s not going to hold back. This trusted advisor will not only tell you the truth but will often tell you “your truth”. So, whether it’s deciding on a new outfit, hairstyle, or a more significant issue, your Authentic Advisor is going to tell you the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. Be cautioned though, she won’t be apologetic but she will remain loyal to the relationship.

Write About It: This week, reflect on the status of your Solid Rock Support System and write about it in your journal. As you write, identify the members of your team. Once you identify them, call up each friend and formally invite them to serve you in this capacity. I’m sure they’ll be honored to take on the role. Finally, ask yourself the following question, “How can I serve someone else in their S.R.S.S. Afterwards, feel free to go my blog and share your breakthroughs!

Until then, make it an awesome week!

Tameka

Write It, Say It, Then Do It!

Write It, Say It, Then Do It!

Visionaries,

So, how are those obstacles coming? Are you tackling them one at a time? A couple of weeks ago, I challenged you to make a list of obstacles that seem to block you from moving forward in your uncompromised vision. From there, you were to choose one obstacle and create a strategy to overcome it. While you reflect on how to overcome this obstacle, think about the questions below. They can help you juggle your thoughts as you create a plan.

Why are you afraid to face this obstacle?

What opportunity can this obstacle create for you?

What are some ways you overcame a challenge in the past? How can you change that strategy and apply it to your current situation?

As you go through this thought process, remember you haven’t taken any action yet. Answering these questions will help you decide what the best strategy to overcome the obstacle is. Remember, the objective is not to avoid the obstacle, it’s to overcome it. The ultimate benefit is that you build resilience, gain the opportunity to identify your character strengths, and learn lessons to share with others.

Write About It: This week, reflect on your answers to the above questions and write about it in your journal. As you write, be truthful and don’t hold back. I’ve often found that before we can effectively take an action, we should first be able to freely write it, and then say it. As the old saying goes, you must crawl before you walk. Feel free to go my blog and share your breakthroughs!

You Are Worth It!

You Are Worth It!

As women, we are often raised as children that it’s polite to always put others first. Even in my own upbringing, I watched my mother sacrifice herself on a day-to-day basis to meet the needs of others. This not only applied to her children but also to others she came in contact with. Although it’s a wonderful thing to give to others, it’s just as important that we apply these same noble deeds to our own lives. Consider these questions:

When was the last time you had intentional uninterrupted time alone (to meditate, pray, read a book)?

Can you recall the last time you slept between 7-8 hours?

Do you have a consistent exercise routine (walking, dancing, biking)?

And this is my all time favorite, When was the last time you said, “No”, to someone who asked you to do something?

Now, I’m sure you’re thinking, this is selfish. However what I’ve learned is that not taking care of myself is selfish. When you don’t take care of yourself, how much are you really able to give to your family, friends, job or business? I’m sure you want to be able to give your very best to your loved ones. So, why not start with giving yourself the very best of you!

Write About It: As you reflect on your answers to the above questions, journal about a plan to change at least one. This week, make a conscious decision to apply one of these self-care actions to your life or be creative and come up with your own.  Feel free to go my blog and share your breakthroughs!

Get Uncomfortable!

Get Uncomfortable!

Greetings Visionaries!

When you think of an obstacle, do you automatically think of the worst? Do you dread going through an obstacle? If so, I would like to challenge you to rethink your current or next challenge.  There are times when our biggest challenges can turn out to be a tremendous breakthrough. However, sometimes we don’t get to the opportunity because we are so afraid of the challenge. The first action to take when being faced with a challenge is to accept the reality that it exists. Avoiding it will rarely get rid of it or bring you success. If you run the other way, you’ll more than likely be faced with the same if not a very similar situation. Use the challenge to your advantage; it will help you build resilience. The Webster dictionary defines resilience as the ability to become strong, healthy, or successful again after something bad happens. Did you notice the order in the definition? The resilience only comes after something bad happens. So in order to overcome an obstacle, you have to face it, to build muscles of resilience, you must go through the obstacle and in order to successfully overcome the obstacle, you must get uncomfortable.

Take some time and journal about one obstacle that seems to be in the way of your vision. Reflect on one step you can take to face the obstacle. Go ahead, get uncomfortable!

So, What’s Your Obstacle?

So, What’s Your Obstacle?

Greetings Visionaries!

The last time we connected, I encouraged you to explore what your “real” dream is. I hope you took the opportunity to really consider your true passion. If there is one thing I’ve learned in life is that many people have a dream but many never take the first step to pursue it. As you continue to think on this dream, what obstacle presents itself from making the dream a reality? Here are some examples of what I’ve heard people say:

“I’m too old.”

“I don’t have enough money.”

“I don’t have enough time.”

“I lack the education/experience.”

So, what’s your obstacle? Take a moment to think about it. Now consider some possible solutions to your obstacle. For example, you may feel your too old to start a business. However, if you follow the business world, it appears the better part of most entrepreneurs are not only 35+ but they are often more successful. Isn’t it funny that what we believe is an obstacle can actually work in our favor? However, let’s say you run into another challenge of not having enough money to accomplish your dream. What are some ways you can obtain the money you need? Some possibilities may be to get a second job, cut back on your expenses, or even earn more money by freelancing on the side. My point is that with every challenge, there are always options. This week, take some time to list the obstacles that stand in your way of accomplishing your dream. Next, start with one obstacle and list some possible solutions.  Which solution do you believe will give you the best outcome? Lastly, take one step toward overcoming that obstacle.

Feel free to share your thoughts and breakthroughs on my blog, I would love to hear from you!

Tameka

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